Hey Slaus.

" girl I tolD you that sweater would be cute with that top. Taste this sauce. I just got the recipe from pinterest. '

I have been married to a wonderful, kind and loving man for a little over 4 years now and I will not hesitate to say that he is easily one of the most amazing souls ever to grace this earth.  He cooks, he cleans, he works and makes very good money, heavily involved with his church, his community, works out daily and has a backside that makes you want to slap it from here to next week. He Is simply amazing and I love him dearly.

He is everything to me. Everything but honest. Within the past year he has become a bit more reserved – a bit more secretive.  Whenever I bring up the topic of children and when we will start trying to have a family, he gives me a dishonest smile and I can see the pain in his eyes as he lies to me about how we have plenty of time to do so.  But a few months ago I discovered that he secretly had a vasectomy.

I was crushed, ohn. I was simply crushed. Then he began changing up his routine like so many men do when they are being unfaithful which caused me to seek the truth in the matter. So I had him followed.

Where I discovered he was secretly meeting up with someone at the gym. Someone whom he would have coffee with whose blonde hairs happen to be all over my husband’s clothes from time to time. Someone I have pictures of him kissing in a parked car.

Someone who is a young handsome man.

Most women are sitting and saying: “O HALE NAWL, GIRL! HALE NAWL!” Ladies, please trust that I did also after I threw up a bit from my car window. Not from the fact MY husband was with a man in an intimate way that only he and I should be in, but just for the fact that he was with someone else.  The first thing I wanted to do was make sure that I was safe and clean and hadn’t caught anything that could affect my well-being from my down low love of my life. All my tests came back clean and I was then free to confront this man about his infidelities and let him know just how hurt I was at his betrayal thought the compassionate fool within me began to see things for what they were. It all made sense now. He had been so distant, do depressed, so despondent and just so not himself over the past year and I could see how much he was hurting.  Unlike heterosexual men who cheat on you and walk about as if nothing was wrong and even strutting about with an extra pep in his step, my husband was the exact opposite.  So instead of confronting him with a blunt object like so many women in the stories do that we laugh about on OHN, I decided to confront him and his lover with as much tact and lack of judgment as I could gather.

That was my plan anyway. I haven’t been able to do it yet.

How do I confront him without pain and anger?

Even with the pain and emotional turmoil I feel about what has happened, I can’t help but to think what he is going through is a hundred times worse since he comes from a very religious family and a father who is a very prominent member of the mega church here.  Though this marriage is over, the love I feel for this man – my best friend, I won’t let him go through all of this alone.

As a friend, how can I help him BE the man he truly is?

I know our divorce will be a very big to-do in his family and the church community but should I allow him to hide and pretend we are still together?

I’m at a loss, ohn.

So the first I did after reading this letter was this….

Then i went back and forth, up and down, left right, left right even before realising that….. I am not going to have all of the answers and that fugg an ego and thinking I can handle every aspect of this shyt on my own soooooOoooooo I went and got help from the GOP.

That’s right, the GOP — That Gay Ohn Peeps. Bytches I know OHn itself is an acronym and you can’t go embedding acronyms all up inside other acronyms but you know what? Bytches this is My house and if I wanna ram acronyms all up inside other acronyms for the fugg of it, I’m gonna do that.

I went to them because there are parts of all this that I have no right addressing as I can’t really relate or truly fathom what the guy might be going through. But before we get to them, I want to discuss YOUUUUUUUUU.

First of all, I am literally floored at the fact that yes this man has cheated on you and is living a lie, but you still want to help him. THAT.. is just… impressive and extremely strong of you…. maybe. Because what a lot of people are going to ask is :” Is she sticking around to help him or can she not let go of the guy.”

My sincerest hopes in all of this is that you are putting your needs towards the top of this whole mess.  I know how you take your faith seriously and you probably view this as some sort of test of your spirit and resolve but, baby…. don’t take on too much! I think staying in a sham of a marriage would be too damn much for everyone involved. ESPECIALLY YOU!!  I know you want to help him get his life in order but at what cost?  Your own sanity? You would consider remaining in the sham marriage for appearances because of who his family is?  Could you really see yourself in the same house as your man and HIS man and maybe your new man?? MY head hurts just imagining it.  If you are going to do this, I say helll no to the fake marriage thing. I just don’t see it working.

As much as you want to help him be who he needs to be, you need to also take care of yourself. There is being strong and then there is just being ridiculous. Don’t be ridiculous, hun.

If you are staying for all the wrong reasons that you are convincing yourself are the right ones…. that is weak and delusional. Don’t do that to yourself.

That is just the start of my opinion but i want to show you what the GOP had to say to you on this..

Reply -1 :

Holy s**tsnacks!

She’s a giver.  A total giver.  Putting her needs second….hell, probably does that with more people than just her husband. I wonder if the need to “pretend that they are still together” is more for her since she’s REALLY into him. But to let him hide?  What does she mean by hide?  Remain in the marriage?  Will she take on a lover?  Turnabout is fair play. I’d have no qualms if they had an arrangement as such, but if not, he comes out smelling like roses because he has to boy and the beard.

I think it’ll be damn near impossible to not have lingering pain and anger from this situation.  Even though dude is a gaymo, it does NOT give him liberty to cheat on his wife.  He’s still a CPOS (cheating piece of s**t).   When you believe in somebody so much, that you commit yourself to them for life, it’s devastating to have it ripped away.  I would tell her to give HERSELF some time to deal with this.  As much as she wants to be supportive, she needs to take care of HERSELF first. 

I think it’s commendable that she would like to still like to be friends with him and help him through this.  How to do it without anger & pain?  That, I do not know.  However, I would recommend that she stick to facts and examples. She’s approaching this with a lot of compassion, so I think she won’t have a hard time speaking to him with compassion.

I’d tell her to let him know that she’s noticed a change in him.  Notice that he’s been distant, hesitant about starting a family, noticed the hairs on his clothes. 

 I would recommend that she tells him how much she loves and supports him not only as a spouse, but as a friend, which would probably disarm him if he thought she would bring up their being married.  

He also may reject her help of “becoming the man he truly is”, so she should potentially brace herself for that. 

Reply -2:

Ok..Coming from the male point of view, having been in his shoes while married to a woman…(yes Slaus..so hush it!)

I never cheated on my wife while we were living together.

I was in denial about it for so many years that I tried to make myself believe that I wasn’t gay.  I was raised in a semi strict Mormon family where I was ordained and on the path to become a church elder.

Now…I was always an angry/bitter SOB because of this.  I took my anger out on everyone else instead of where it needed to be directed, myself.

I didn’t realize any of that until after we broke up…

Once I finally admitted to myself that I was gay and accepted myself, then I slowly began telling others.  Without knowing what the change entailed, those around me could tell that I was different.  Some even jokingly asked if I was now taking medication.

When I eventually told my ex why I had become distant to her and was always so angry with everyone, she could see where I was coming from.

Now..This man knows he is gay and accepts it apparently, so he needs to man the hell up and end the marriage.  He should have ended it it way before he started fooling around with anyone else.

How should she confront him?  She doesn’t have to verbally confront him.  If she follows him again, and they are seen kissing, she can walk or drive by and honk or wave and make it a point that they see her….

Or…She could send him a text stating that “I know what is going on.  We need to talk about it.”
That would put the ball in his court (no pun intended) and open up the gateway for a more honest discussion…Confronting him in a hostile manner will just make matters worse.

Once the discussion starts, then and only then can they try to salvage any remnants of their relationship.  They may chose to stay together in a sham (for lack of better word) marriage so that no one else finds out, or they could split, or split and he get his snip snip reversed and become a sperm donor for her to have kids….(gay men and their str8 women friends do that all the time)

Shyt..3 yrs after me and my ex wife split she was callin me askin me to donate so she could have a kid cause she loved my blonde hair and blue eyes…LOL  (told her NO)

Either way, they need to have the conversation sooner rather than later.  The longer she stews over this, the bigger chances of it not ending in a productive manner….

Like I said, start it by sending him a text “Hey..Listen, I know what is going on.  We need to talk about the situation.”

 

Reply 3 - She’s not going to want to hear this, she even ends the letter by saying that she’s willing to accept a pretend marriage (!), to save face I guess, but she has to confront him. She’s going to be angry, furious and she’s entitled to be so she needs to stop worrying about not being angry. She needs to let him know, now, and she needs to get her family and or friends around her and figure out a way to MOVE ON. He’s GAY. You will NEVER change him. You need to understand that you are with one of those not so mythological down low brothers we hear so much about and good for her if she can do this with compassion but she needs to divorce him because he will NEVER change. This ex-gay bulls**t you hear about is just that, bulls**t. Sorry if I’m a bit blunt but she needs to realize she has two choices: stay married to him, go to a preacher and try and change him and after years of ex-gay counseling, she’ll still end up where she’s at now because you can NOT change someone’s sexuality. Or you can make the very painful decision of ending it, quietly and with compassion if she can, and have a chance at finding love again with a straight man. There is a third choice, which is accept that he will have occasional or not so occasional sex with other men and figure out a way to live with it but I doubt most women can handle this kind of relationship. Good luck and this might help: I hope I have the right site but there are groups for women married to gay men all over the country like this one…

http://www.gay-married.org/wives.html

When Washington resident Mica Craig headed to the Clarkston Walmart on Friday, he was only looking to pick up some mulch for his medical marijuana growing business. Unfortunately, he also ended up leaving with a rattlesnake bite.

The 47-year-old was out in the parking lot garden center when he came upon the Walmart rattlesnake, according to KIRO radio. He bent down to pick up a stick, but when that stick bit his hand, he realized it was a snake. He then started “screaming bloody murder.”

Luckily, a nearby shopper acted fast and got Mica Craig to a local emergency room. It was there that doctors initially diagnosed it as a “dry bite” and sent him home with instructions to come back in case of swelling, according to Reuters. He returned 20 minutes later after his hand swelled up to the “size of a grapefruit.”

ER doctor Jay Hunter said that Craig initially showed no signs that venom had been injected. But when Craig came back he was treated with six vials of anti-venom, The Spokesman-Reviewreports.

Walmart has issued an apology for the rattlesnake incident, and a spokesperson told Reuters that pest management is taking a closer look at the property. A Walmart claims adjuster has also been in contact with Craig. It’s unclear whether there is a problem at the site or if the rattlesnake was shipped with the garden supplies.

It’s also unclear at this point whether Walmart can be held responsible for Craig’s injuries. Unless there is a rattlesnake problem in the area there doesn’t seem to have been any reason for Walmart to have inspected the parking lot for snakes. It may have simply been a bizarre and unpreventable accident. [source]

BYTCH, let  me telllll you something. The reason why even my mexican friends have started calling me Slausito Ramirez is because during warm weather months, I spend ALLLLLLL ofmy time outside in the lawn, garden and or looking at lawn n garden supplies at Home Depot, menards and wal-mart, any place they sell outdoor goods. But… but… let me go thinking i’m reaching for some Hostas or some type of lawn tools and I end up bitten by a snake….. on.every.thing.i.love…. somebody is either paying up.. or getting their christmas cancelled with a knife to the face, son! aLLLL to the face!!!

This wasn’t a lil punk-ass garter snake that SOME people are terrified of (bef ass bef) But this was a rattlesnake! Venomous, son!!!!Venomous, sir!!!!!

Somebody would have written me a check or had their soul stabbed out of their body.

Quit boooolshytting!!!

This whole thing reminds me of a conversation bef and I just had about the fact we are both some old lady punks when it comes to creep crawly shyt…

Slaus: Bef I screamed like a bus load of bytches yesterday
Slaus: I was outside on the patio with my laptop and a big ass black spider was on my leg
Slaus: shyt was bigger than all outside!!!!!!!!!!
Slaus: ( maybe an inch big and inch wide )
bethlanai1970: like that anaconda snake I saw in my backyard? ( it was a lil ass garter snake yalllll tiny as fugg )
bethlanai1970: man I feel you
Slaus: LMAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO exactly!!!!!!
bethlanai1970: folks don’t be understanding the s**t we see
bethlanai1970: they don’t be knowing our struggle
Slaus: yo.. why did i jump up and then jump out into the grass.
bethlanai1970: man I will move heaven and earth to get away from a spider
Slaus: that shyt was bigger than chicago.
bethlanai1970: I believe you…I do…I know that anaconda is laying and waiting on me to have my guard down just one time and he gonna get me  (ol little punk-ass snake she still haunted by)
Slaus: we some punks
bethlanai1970: punk ass punks!
Slaus: let me ever see a mouse in my house.
Slaus: i will set that shyt on fire
bethlanai1970: LMAOOOOOOOOOOO
Slaus: i can deal with the ghost in my house but.. let it be a mouse
bethlanai1970: see we got life all fucked up cause I’m the same way
bethlanai1970: why you think I don’t kill the stray cats in my yard…they keep the mice away
Slaus: i talk to the ghost,, gave the bytch a name…… picking with the ghost… but let me see a roach
Slaus: or a mouse
Slaus: it will look like expendables 2 was filmed in my house
bethlanai1970: LMAO!!!
bethlanai1970: you remember how I was about the little tiny snake in the basement last year…
bethlanai1970: I still be looking around when I do laundry
Slaus: lol
Slaus: i don’t blame you… cuz i dont fugg with spiders. having nearly lost my leg by one?? shyyyyyt
bethlanai1970: you said you nearly lost your leg though
bethlanai1970: LMAOOOOO
Slaus: LMAO nawl that aint an exaggeration lol
bethlanai1970: we need to post this convo…
Slaus: the Dr told me if my dumb ass had waited abother few days, my leg woulda been infected beyond infected
Slaus: he was like.. WHY would you wait till it got this bad!!! another week, i’d have just removed your leg
Slaus: me: :: lip quiver ::
bethlanai1970: you got bit by a spider ewwww!!!
Slaus: giiiiiirl… HOW have i never told you that story!!
Slaus: lol
Slaus: duuuuuude
Slaus: peter parker got bit and got powers. I got bit and got a limp
bethlanai1970: LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
bethlanai1970: I had to cover my mouth to keep from hollering
bethlanai1970: stop talking to me

I don’t know how I haven’t told you guys the spider bite story before. It is almost as funny as my notorious RollerBear story….

What’s your worst encounter with a rodent,snake and or insect……..

Two parent chaperones have been accused of spraying Lysol on students during a Colorado high school prom because teen’s “dirty dancing” looked like “they were advertising butt sex.”

A police report obtained by The Smoking Gun on Tuesday indicates that Jennifer Farmer and Hannah Rockey were charged with “harassment” because they directed obscene language at students attending Manitou Springs High School last month.

According to one of the seven victimized students, the women told female students that they were “advertising butt sex” and called them “sluts and whores.”

“Ms. Farmer and Ms. Rocky [sic] advised that some of the kids were becoming disruptive and were being explicit while dancing,” the police report says. “Ms. Farmer advised that when the kids were being inappropriate she had ways to deter the behavior. She would use Lysol spray, flashlight or another unknown object to shy students way [sic] from certain styles of dancing.”

“They are dancing like they are having sex with their clothes on,” which made the girls look “trashy, dirty and whorish,” the women reportedly told police.

Manitou Springs police department’s Lt. Jim Hopkins told Denver’s 7News that only one student wished to press charges, but all eight teens verified that the incident took place. The students said that Lysol got on their clothes and in their eyes and mouths, forcing some to leave the prom.

Hopkins said his department decided to charge the women with harassment instead of assault.

“None of the children or kids complained about anything like that,” he said. “It just — it got in their throat, they claimed and stuff like this. But there was no physical damage done.”

While Rockey’s insisted to 7News that “there was no Lysol,” the school’s director of athletics told police that “they did admit to spraying the cleaning product.” [source]

First of all, these women are better than me because I wish I would chaperon a damn highschool dance these days. Shiiiiiiiiiiiiit i’d be afraid Chris Hanson would be about to get me for watching child pornography n ish. These kids are naaaaasty!  All those damn hormones, being built the way they are built, and basically being raised by smutty azz social media and gossip girl has these kids pretty much sucking on labia on the dance floor. With that said though, you can’t go around spraying muf***a’s kids like bad ass cats on the counter n shyt. You can’t just run up on a kid and spray them in the face with Lemon water talking about: Bad kitty slut! Bad kitty!

Still.

… I kinda don’t blame these heffas. Buuuuuuut wrong is wrong.

What say you?

A Waukegan man took a plea deal that kept him out of prison for an incident in which he took a needle and thread to his son’s buttocks.

Randy Swopes, 52, represented himself in court Friday to accept a plea deal that sentenced him to 24 months of probation and 250 hours of public service for the January 2008 incident, according to Assistant State’s Attorney Danielle Pascucci.

Swopes’ son was 14 at the time of the incident. The teenager has Crohn’s Disease, which is an autoimmune disorder in which the body’s immune system destroys healthy tissue, according to the U.S. National Library of Medicine. Crohn’s Disease affects the gastrointestinal tract and can cause fevers, stomach pain and other problems depending on which part of the gastrointestinal system is affected.

Swopes’ son was suffering from a fistula at the time of the offense. A fistula is an abnormal connection between an organ and another structure.

The teenage boy had a fistula in his butt and his father opted to sew it shut himself rather than take his son to the hospital, Pascucci said. The 14-year-old wound up in the hospital for almost a month because the wound became infected, she said.

Swopes was charged with aggravated battery and could have spent two to five years in prison for this offense. He took an Alford plea, which admits that there is enough evidence to convict but is not a direct admission of guilt, Pascucci said. [source]

First of all, Crohn’s Disease is really messed up. It’s a terrible disease.

…….

……………………..but i was pretty much done with the sentence: “had a fistula in his butt ” and I know I know I know it’s wrong as hale but…. this is just not something you can say and not get a few looks of guilty horror and suppressed giggles.

As a parent, I would do anything to help my babies, anything in this world. Buuuuuuuuuuuut damn performing home surgery on them n ish! Daaaamn that.

Oh and if you are curious to know what a fistula is, it’s not that awful at all… here take a look… trust me…..dooooooo it. You know you want to know……

I really aint shyt for posting that link. But curiosity got the better of me and if I’m gonna be scared for life, some of you need to be also.

Thanks to hautie for the send in.

Ok, just when I have convinced myself that we are going to stop doing special shout outs and the likes here at OHN and I totallllly have the decision etched in stone, I remember that there are just SOME people i’ve just got to let know how much I appreciate them and how much they mean to OHN.

One of those people is that fool: Day. Aka That Dude Bennett.

His participation and commentary daily here at ohn for the past few years are always some of my favourites even when I’m the butt of the jokes n shyt.

Regardless, Dude is a big part of the OHN community and it wouldn’t be the same around here with out him…

HAPPY BDAY, dude!!

MESA, Ariz. (CBS Las Vegas) — A woman has been accused of faking breast cancer to raise money to get implants.

Jami Toler, 27, appeared in a Maricopa County court Thursday on felony fraud and theft charges after allegedly bilking people out of more than $8,000 to get breast implants. She was arrested Wednesday.

KPHO-TV reports that Toler scammed at least 17 people, including family, friends and co-workers.

Toler initially told people that she was diagnosed with Stage 2 breast cancer last August and said she needed a mastectomy. Toler’s mom, Vickie Schirtzinger, even created a “Jami’s Hope” page on the Give Forward website to help raise money for her daughter’s medical expenses.

“The doctor states that Jami needs a mastectomy,” the fundraising website said. “The doctor is helping as much as he can but the cost is still very expensive. Jami has no insurance and is needing help with the medical expenses.”

Police told Arizona Family that Toler’s scam began to unravel after she turned down an offer from a doctor who would have treated the breast cancer for free.

“Her medical records indicated that there was no breast cancer or anything like that, no issues what so ever,” Sgt. Anthony Landato of the Mesa Police Department told Arizona Family.

Toler got the breast implants in November, according to KPHO.

The judge ordered her to stay away from the 17 victims she allegedly scammed and was told she must wear an ankle bracelet. [source]

Maaaaaan bunk saying there is a dark place in hell for her, I say toss  mofos in a roaring furnace right now!

“like a boss…. ”

"Mildred saw that muf***a at last...and at last...there would be some shyt."

Another teenager is dead and another adult who should have known better stands accused of driving drunk and then fleeing from the scene.

This time the tragic tale is set in Lancaster, where 14-year-old Bryce W. Buchholz of Elma died Thursday night after he was struck by an SUV.

The Lancaster Middle School student was headed home on his favorite orange bike after riding with friends in the village, when he was hit and left on the side of Lake Avenue.

Lancaster police said the man behind the wheel was Michael C. Ettipio, 23, of Lancaster who was driving home after allegedly drinking six beers at a local tavern.

He was located because a witness tracked him down to the driveway of his family’s home, put him into his own car and made him return to the scene of the crash, authorities said.

“I grabbed him by the back of his shirt and said: Let’s go,” Benny Kirkland, 40, told The Buffalo News. “You’re going to answer for what you did.”

“It’s in the news every single day,” said Lancaster Police Lt. Ronald Rozler, who broke down in tears during a news conference following Ettipio’s arraignment. “It’s a tragic event that changes so many lives. You’d hope at some point, people would get the message that it could happen to you.”

Ettipio has been charged with second-degree vehicular manslaughter, leaving the scene of a fatal accident, driving while intoxicated and failure to keep right. Police records indicate a roadside breath test showed Ettipio’s blood alcohol content was .225 percent — nearly three times the legal limit.

The 23-year-old Lancaster man looked ashen Friday morning as he was brought into Town Court in handcuffs for his arraignment.

In court were his distraught parents and friends, who wiped away tears as the judge read the charges against him.

In asking to keep bail at $10,000, defense attorney Mark Sacha told the judge Ettipio was a lifelong resident of Lancaster who graduated from Lancaster High, has a full-time job and no criminal record.

“He is a great kid, judge,” Sacha said. “This whole case is a tragedy.”

Assistant District Attorney Peter Cosgrove asked for bail to be set at $50,000 but the judge settled on $25,000.

The accident unfolded as the sun was setting Thursday night.

Bryce, an eighth-grader at Lancaster Middle, had gone to school earlier that day and then went out with friends to ride and do bike stunts in the Village of Lancaster. When one boy got a call from his mother to come home because it was getting dark, Bryce rode home with him.

The boy, whose name is being withheld by The News because he is 14, rode about 100 feet behind Bryce. Neither were wearing helmets, according to a statement he gave to police.

The boys were southbound on Lake — a long, straight road with a single lane in each direction and no sidewalks — riding on the east side of the road against traffic when they came up on the intersection of Lake and Sagebrush Lane, the boy told police.

They were riding “as far as possible off the road without riding on the grass,” the boy told police.

At about 8:45 p.m., the boy heard the roar of an engine. “It sounded close,” the boy said in his statement. “I looked to my right and see a black square vehicle go by me.”

The vehicle, also southbound, was in the northbound lane as it swerved around him and then veered into Sagebrush at the intersection where Bryce was.

Bryce was struck so hard that witnesses said his bike flew in one direction and he was thrown onto the grass.

“The driver never stopped and got out or checked on Bryce,” the boy told police. “He just kept going.”

The boy said he rode up to Bryce, who lay in a pool of blood. He pulled out his cellphone but neighbors who had heard the commotion said they had already called for help. The boy went to a nearby house and called his mother.

Across the street, Kirkland was reaching into his car to roll up the back windows. He had just taken his family out for a treat at a Tim Hortons.

Through the back window in the car, he watched as the SUV smashed into Bryce, he told The News and police investigators.

“The guy flew off at a high rate of speed like there wasn’t a care in the world,” Kirkland said.

As his girlfriend went to check on the boy lying in the grass, Kirkland said he watched the SUV speed away.

“I noticed he made a left on Windsor Ridge,” he said — the only left turn off Lake in that direction before it dead ends. An avid fan of crime shows that emphasize how critical the first few moments after an incident can be to an investigation, Kirkland knew what he had to do.

“I got in my car and I kind of sped down to there to try and find him,” he said. By the time Kirkland got to Windsor Ridge, he lost sight of the car.

So he prayed.

“I asked God: Give me what you’ve got to give me. Let’s do this. Let’s find him. I prayed to Him to put me in the right direction,” said Kirkland, a transportation worker out on disability.

Kirkland said he drove the winding roads of Windsor Ridge, made a right turn onto Buckingham Court and saw out of the corner of his eye a man getting out of his vehicle that had been backed into a driveway.

The man was looking at a damaged front headlight.

“He went to see what damage he did to his vehicle and not to see what he did over here,” Kirkland said, pointing to the spot where Bryce was struck.

Kirkland stopped his car and confronted Ettipio.

“You were just in that accident on Lake and Sagebrush,” Kirkland said.

“Yeah,” Ettipio replied, according to Kirkland.

Kirkland said Ettipio smelled of alcohol and appeared to stagger.

“I grabbed him by the back of the shirt and with a few choice words and a little roughness, I put him in the car,” Kirkland said.

In the meantime, Ettipio’s father came out of the house. “Don’t hurt my son,” the father told Kirkland.

Kirkland then told the father what happened. “Your son just killed some boy on Lake and Sagebrush,” he said.

The father first replied: “There is no Lake and Sagebrush.”

“Yes, there is,” Kirkland shot back. “I live right across the street. Your son just killed somebody.”

The father didn’t understand. “He hit and ran,” Kirkland said. “He ran home.”

Kirkland said the father looked at Ettipio and asked him if it was true.

“Yes, I did,” Ettipio said, according to Kirkland.

Kirkland said he put Ettipio in the back seat of his car, and he drove him back to the scene, Ettipio barely spoke.

Kirkland said he suppressed an urge to hit Ettipio. At one point, he told the man in the back of his car: “Your parents are going through a lot of hell right now, let alone the parents of the kid … Do you realize what your drinking has done?”

As they turned the corner from Windsor Ridge back on to Lake, they could see the flashing lights of emergency vehicles.

“Oh my God, dude. Are you serious?” Ettipio said, according to Kirkland.

Kirkland drove into a driveway near the crash scene. He found a neighbor and told him: “If this guy jumps out, you do what you gotta do.”

As neighbors began to surround the car, a police officer came.

“Here you go,” Kirkland said. “This is the guy who was driving the car.”

The officer took Ettipio aside. Kirkland said he watched as more officers arrived and questioned Ettipio.

“They took him over to show him the blood, to show him what he did,” Kirkland said.

Midday Friday, Bryce’s friends came to the same spot to bring flowers and glow sticks so they would be illuminated in the dark.

Many of the teens had gone to school earlier to meet with counselors but were too distraught to stay in class, one of their mothers said.

“He was the nicest kid,” Gina Graziani, 13, said. “He would never do anything to hurt anybody. He loved his bike. He was always on his bike after school. Him and his friends: They would just ride.” [source]

OK this is not a real movie but…. I realllllllly wish it was because… mannnnnnn It’s pac-man, bytch!!! And Pac-man is awesome!

Thanks to my Kids for the send in… yeah.. my kids found this.

Smartphones have long been a must-have accessory, but sex toys are quickly becoming one of the world’s most popular gadgets.

Experts believe the willingness of stars such as Gwyneth Paltrow and Jane Fonda to divulge their bedroom secrets are behind a recent surge in the sales of ‘pleasure goods’. 

While the UK sex toy business is now worth £250 million a year, global sales of erotic accessories are to set to rise to 400 million.

While some of Hollywood’s most famous leading ladies have opened up about their sex lives in the new TV series, The Conversation With Amanda de Cadenet – the UK  is following suit in a Channel 4 documentary ‘More Sex Please, We’re British’.

The hour-long fly on-the-wall set to air on Tuesday, focuses on Britain’s biggest online sex toy retailer, lovehoney.co.uk.

Originally founded in 2002 by Neal Slateford and Richard Longhurst, Lovehoney the company, which offers an array of goods from adult toys and sexy lingerie, to erotic literature and games, has seen its sales increase each year to a current total of £16 millon.

Co-owner Mr Slateford, a former record producer for Kylie Minogue, stated that celebrities opening up about their sex lives had been a key sales driver.

He said: ‘A famous celebrity will give a big interview about their sex life or their love of sex toys and we will see a flurry of sales afterwards.

‘It all started with Sex In The City – which was incredibly liberating for women, especially after Charlotte became a virtual recluse after buying a rabbit vibrator at New York’s famous Pleasure Chest sex story.

‘Suddenly ordinary women weren’t afraid to talk about their sex lives and their use of sex toys.’

Lovehoney estimate that nearly half the nation owns a sex toy, while global sales of vibrators and other sex toys soared to £5.5billion-a-year and are to set to rise to £40billion by 2020 – matching those of smartphones.

It all started with Sex In The City – which was incredibly liberating for women… Suddenly ordinary women weren’t afraid to talk about their sex lives

In light of this, a number of high street retailers such as Boots, Tesco and Superdrug now stock erotic goods.

Mr Slateford added: ‘It’s great that celebrities are being more honest about their sex lives. There has been such a huge change in people’s attitudes over the last 10 years.

‘Now mainstream retailers like Boots, Tesco and Superdrug sell sex toys. 

‘Take a walk down the pharmacy aisle and you’ll see vibrating penis rings and bullet vibrators alongside the condoms.’

While sales of sex toys had been held back in the past due to an association with the sleazy, male dominated pornography industry, according to the counselling service Relate, women are now becoming far less shy about sexual aids.

A report by retail analysts Hewson confirmed there had been a revolution in the past 30 years, driven by the fact that women have a more powerful position in the home and work place.

‘Celebrity endorsement of sex toys by star such as Teri Hatcher, Eva Longoria and Halle Berry act as validators for brands and women alike,’ researchers said.

Several female celebrities talked openly about their favourite sexual positions in U.S. TV interviews screened last week.

Asked for her favourite, Oscar winner Gwyneth Paltrow, 39, wife of Coldplay singer Chris Martin, said: ‘I’m down with all of them.’

Zoe Saldana, 33, star of Avatar and Pirates of the Caribbean, said: ‘I like missionary and I like being on my knees too. And I love being on top or standing up.’

Meanwhile, the X Factor star Tulisa blushed when her rabbit vibrator accidentally went off in her suitcase when she was picking up her baggage at Miami airport.

Desperate Housewives star Eva Longoria, 37, revealed that some of the best sex she had ever experienced was with a sex toy.

She said in an interview: ‘I own two and I have a Rabbit one. I give that as a gift all the time. It’s the best gift to give – an orgasm.’

Teri Hatcher, 47, also from Desperate Housewives, said: ‘To be honest, I don’t know what I want a male for. I have some fabulous electronics to use instead. And any woman who tells you she doesn’t is lying.’

Myleene Klass, 34, is another vibrator enthusiast – buying them for showbiz pals such as Suzanne Shaw, who she sang with her in the band Hear’Say. [source]

I kinda zoned out on this whole article when they got to the part about Zoe saldana talking about loving to be on her knees and… :: SHUDDDERS ::: GOOD LORD GOOOD DAAAAAAAMN!!!!!

Laaaawd, Zoe….

Zoe Saldana...proving there isn't a damn thing wrong with thin women.....

Anyway…  I took to facebook chat last night to ask many of you about your thoughts on the subject and these are some of my favourite comments which were the result:

” Men talk about women but the reality is that men come with way too much baggage these days. They are seriously f*cked in the head 9 times out of 10 and only good for one thing. Now we women are more comfortable buying that one thing ourselves.”

” Because we’d rather not have to deal with the DICK the penis is attached to.”

” Nothing will replace getting my hair pulled, spanked and handled around the room like my well being don’t mean shyt. These days that comes at way too high of a mental price for most women. Look at poor Serena Williams. Men every where would slap their mother’s to hit that and even SHE can’t find a lasting loving relationship. Head is great but not worth the headaches and heart aches”

“I could be using my rabbit right now instead of talking to you, Slaus. Lemme’lone”

Damn… the ladies were kind of aaaaaangry on this one.

I’ve got my own theories but im more interested in hearing what you have to say….

Speak on it…..

South Korean authorities have seized thousands of pills containing the powdered flesh of fetuses and babies that were smuggled in from China to be used as Viagara-style performance enhancers, according to multiple reports.

Nearly 17,500 of the bizarre capsules have been grabbed from tourists’ luggage and international mail since last August, the state-run Korea Customs service said in a statement Monday. The capsules were made in northeastern China in a stomach-turning process in which dead babies’ bodies were chopped into small pieces and dried on stoves before being turned into powder, the Korea Customs Service said. Customs officials refused to say where the dead babies came from or who made the capsules, citing possible diplomatic friction with Beijing. China ordered an investigation into the production of drugs made from dead fetuses or newborns last year.

The pills, which are typically smuggled in by ethnic Koreans living in northern China, aren’t just creepy, they contain “super bacteria” that is hazardous to human health, the statement said. South Korea began cracking down on the drugs last year after a television network aired a documentary accusing Chinese pharmaceutical companies of collaborating with abortion clinics to make the pills from human fetuses and the remains of dead infants, according to The Wall Street Journal.

Twisted myths about the medical powers of dead babies have long persisted in parts of China. Consumption of human placentas is believed to help revive blood supply and circulation, and many believe the fetus is a “tonic” for disease has kept the pills in demand, according to the China Daily. But the latest use of fetal tissue is as a sexual performance enhancer, according to a report in the Global Times, a tabloid published by the official People’s Daily.

Some among the approximately 35 smugglers who have been caught told customs officials they believed the capsules were ordinary stamina boosters and did not know the ingredients or manufacturing process. Ethnic Koreans from northeastern China who now live in South Korea were intending to use the capsules themselves or share them with other Korean-Chinese, a customs official said. They were carried in luggage or sent by international mail.

The South Korean customs announcement came weeks after Health Ministry regulators in China suspended sales of 13 drugs after finding they were encased in gelatin capsules that contained excessive levels of chromium. According to China’s state broadcaster, CCTV, the toxic drug capsules were believed to originate from factories in China’s coastal Zhejiang province and had been made using scraps of leftover leather. [source]

The first time we reported this story a few months back, i just knew it was some ol boolshyt and a new urban myth ass myth. Buuuuuuut now…I see that it is all true and….. just ugh. UGH!

Lemme tell you this, son…. Whatever the hell is going on with my penis, I’m not curing it with baby parts, bytch. Nope not nan not never!

I mean… not unless it gave my jibby just strength beyond strength for a 4 hours marathon session of impaling and wait.. no no no no.. not then neither…but…well.. NOOOO!! :: trying to stop the voices in my head ::

But what if these pills could …cure cancer or something? Could you take it then??? uuuugh i’m torn…..

Minced-up powdered baby parts though, dude?

eww….